I have been struggling with bipolar (also known as manic-depression) for many years now and only recently had my first hospital stay. My mania ran out of control and I lost grips with reality and I found myself in a place where I didn't recognize anyone or anything and I was angry at everything including God and creation. In one final desperate act, and an attempt at telling creation to "F" Off, I grabbed the pills in a (luckily) failed suicide attempt.

Losing grip with reality has some lasting consequences that I am only now realizing. I find myself gun shy and almost afraid that my grip on reality will let go without any provocation. I know this to be innacurate but it still doesn't ease my fears.

On these pages you will find my art. The expression of the inner monster that lets itself loose onto canvas. It's my release and my safe haven at the same time. When the world around me seems out of control, I resort to those things that I can, like my paint brush and my oil paints.